I know that being a mother is a gift from God! I love these four people more then I could have thought possible. I have a crazy amount of guilt that I deal with by eating. Yup, I said it. I eat my way to happiness. Okay, any armchair psyc doctors in training can tell me how to fix this. But if you deal with what I do on a daily basis you need to put events in little boxes so you can deal with what comes up. Here it is....in this house we have a mixed bag of illness. Type 1 diabetes, ADHD, Aspergers, heart disease, thyroid disease, and a few other dangling issues. But as a mother of four they all seem to fall into my lap. Yes I said it, that totally sucks. My heart feels like it is down around my knees it is so full of love for these guys but I would LOVE a little break. I would love to come up for air long enough not to worry about these guys. I know it is not correct but I would like things to be easy for me. I would like these guys to sail though w no issues. And I would like my husband and I not to have so many things to come at us one after another.
That's it, that is my anger of motherhood for the moment. I know once I show up to pick up the kids from school this feeling of despair will go away so for this moment I wanted to capture the crazy so maybe I can leave the feeling behind me and go on and be strong.
Thanks for listening world!
CREATE SOMETHING FABULOUS TODAY!
